Falling or Flying?
It was a big fall. As I stood on the edge and looked over my knees trembled and my hands quivered. It was the highest height I had ever seen and all of a sudden I was paralyzed with the fear of heights. As I talked myself out of jumping I could hear the laughter of those behind me and my 7 year old ego took over. I walked to back to the edge of the Olympic sized diving platform and jumped. The fall felt like forever and when I hit the water my husky 7 year old frame discovered the truth about pain. At that point a rule was created in my consciousness, “always fear jumping – it hurts”.
True to form I have allowed my life to be ruled by that fear for 28 years. Don’t jump – it hurts. Oh I am the master of change, the advocate for living on the edge, a soap box preacher for changing it up but when push comes to shove – I turtle and play it safe. What a hypocrite eh? Here’s a guy who writes a blog about Living Your Dreams and can’t even walk the walk. I was faced with the opportunity this past April to finally live my dreams and truly begin my journey. I was at the cross roads again – go on my own and start the company I have always dreamed of owning or accept an opportunity to do what I have done for over 14 years and manage a Porsche dealership in downtown Toronto. You know what I chose – safe. I chose the money. I chose the security. I chose to not take my own advice, not jump off that edge, and not take the risk. I chose the road of hypocrisy. This is the very reason I have not written since the end of April. How can I write about Living Your Dream when I can’t even do that myself? Have you ever done that? Have you ever made decisions knowing what you wanted to do or even needed to do but the fear was so huge you chose to stay safe and unhappy rather than the alternative?
My name is Sean Moffett and I am a hypocrite.
But I have great news! There is hope for us. There is hope for me. I finally did it. I jumped. I took my own advice and I am now living my dreams. The Moffett Company has been established and I am speaking, training, and consulting and loving every minute of it. There has been a wealth of affirmation for my decision and with the admission of my fear and willingness to talk about what has shackled me for so long I am finding hundreds of other people who have experienced these same feelings. And as we share our triumphs and stumbles it’s overwhelming to know I’m not alone.
What fears are holding you back? If you had a magic wand and could wave it and change one thing in your life what would that one thing be? What would you do for free if you could? Please share your stories.
The wind is blowing through my hair as I fly through the air. I have finally jumped. If you hear a splat – send help…but from my view – the sky’s the limit.
Blessings – Sean
The smartest person I know – a true story
He’s probably the smartest person I know. For that matter he’s probably the smartest person you know. My friend Gary (I have changed his name) is one of my closest friends. He once shared with me his stated mission in life, as a teen, was to be the smartest person anyone had ever met. Gary succeeded. He teaches for a living and actually learned Greek (Latin) and Hebrew to understand the context of the historical writings he was teaching in order to have a better handle on the historical significance of what had been written thousands of years ago. I have a hard time with Dr. Seuss at bed time with my kids. Hebrew? No way. So it should be no surprise Gary’s made a huge impact on my life in so many ways. The least of which is a seed knowledge he planted in me 9 years ago which I have been trying to harvest for almost as long. The beauty of his brilliance is in the truth of what he said. Fittingly, the beauty of my stupidity is it only took 9 years to figure out what he was talking about.
When I asked Gary how he knew he wanted to teach and what steps he took to get there he shared this with me. Gary said, “Sean – when you get to the place in your life when you can no longer look in the mirror because you are not doing the one thing you know in your soul you were made to do, you will know it is time to do whatever you have to in order to live out your calling.” This statement changed my life. Not at first. At first I thought, “I am there now!” At least I thought I was. In fact there have been countless times I have thought I was there…Gary’s statement ringing in my head… longing to be fulfilled in my work. What took me 9 years to realize is actually what the absolute gut wrenching process of getting to the point where you cannot look in the mirror is. You see for me, I never have liked what I see in the mirror. Looking in the mirror has always been wretched. Maybe you’re like me – you may not tell anyone how you really feel about yourself – but the reason you spend all that time in front of the mirror is to try to convince yourself you’re not as bad as you think. Maybe it’s just me. What I never realized was Gary’s comment was less about the mirror and more about the soul. It was nothing new to me to not like what was in the mirror, as I say I have been dealing with that my entire life. But actually listening to the whispers of my soul? Totally new. Being the kind of person who tends to speak first and listens much later I have not often practiced purposeful listening. Especially to myself. However over the last 9 years God has been working in me – changing me from the inside – allowing growth in the areas of greatest need. 9 years after Gary’s life altering wisdom I heard my soul. It whispered to me. I finally came to terms with what my calling was and I no longer would let fear, self loathing, and the loud voice I have always listened to tell me I couldn’t do it. It was finally clear – I could no longer live without living out my calling. Whatever it takes to see that happen is what it will take. As the famed radio announcer Dave Ramsey says, “To live like no one else in order to live like no one else.” After 9 years Gary’s words are so clear. I get it. And I also have come to terms with why so many times before I thought I was at that place in my life but in fact was so far from it. It’s not about the mirror – it’s about the soul.